I Will Carry You

I've had a song on my mind that I just wanted to share.  I recently read a book by Angie Smith, wife of singer Todd Smith of the Christian group Selah.  Angie and Todd had a daughter who was diagnosed with a fatal heart defect before birth, and Angie shares her story in her book I Will Carry You: The Sacred Dance of Grief and Joy.  I really recommend it to anyone who is going through, or has gone through a similar situation.  I've read other books along these same lines, but Angie's faith in Christ is inspiring.  Also, while she is strong in her faith, she also shares the struggles she had concerning her faith.  Many people think that because we are believers, we should be strong all the time.  And while I have found a strength in God that I could never make it through all of this without, I also struggle daily.  Many days, it's hard to find the words to pray.  It's hard to get up and go about my daily business and act like my heart isn't shattered.  But He gives me the strength to carry on.  Someone told me a few weeks ago, when I was at a point where I felt like I just couldn't hardly make it through each day without breaking apart, that I seemed to have really grown in my faith over the previous few weeks.  And I just felt like laughing because I felt like I was doing worse than ever.  But then when talking to another friend about it, she reminded me that the fact that I had survived those weeks where I was at my lowest showed that He was keeping me strong and that my faith was growing.  I was leaning on Him and depending on Him to keep me going.  I'm so thankful that even when I feel my worst, the Lord is constantly carrying me.  And I am so incredibly thankful and blessed that He has chosen me to carry one of his precious miracles. 

So back to Angie...she wrote a song, along with her husband and a friend of theirs, that Selah sings.  It is called I Will Carry You.  It's really hard to describe the song, so I'll just share the lyrics.

          There were photographs I wanted to take
          Things I wanted to show you
          Sing sweet lullabies, wipe your teary eyes
          Who could love you like this?
          People say that I am brave but I'm not
          Truth is I'm barely hanging on
          But there's a greater story
          Written long before me
          Because He loves you like this

          So I will carry you
          While your heart beats here
          Long beyond the empty cradle
          Through the coming years
          I will carry you
          All my life
          And I will praise the One who's chosen me
          To carry you

          Such a short time
          Such a long road
          All this madness
          But I know
          That the silence
          Has brought me to His voice
          And He says

          I've shown her photographs of time beginning
          Walked her through the parted seas
          Angel lullabies, no more teary eyes
          Who could love her like this?

          I will carry you
         While your heart beats here
         Long beyond the empty cradle
         Through the coming years
         I will carry you
        All your life
        And I will praise the One who's chosen me
        To carry you.

Not much more to that I can add.  Will update soon.  We have a dr's appt this afternoon.  Prayers much appreciated!  Love ya'll!